Glorious potentiality...

Sometimes you open the window to post something and that blank white space is just screaming at you to TYPE SOMETHING, PLEASE OH PLEASE and it’s just too much pressure so you switch to Zappos real quick like and pretend you don’t have absolutely nothing to say. But I don’t. And that is frustrating. Why don’t I have anything I want to talk about? Things are going on… volleyball leagues and wedding preparations and crazy job stuff and church changing. And I could and probably will post about all of these things at some point. But there’s something else that’s bugging me this week. I haven’t been blogging long, but if I had I would probably have several very similar entries to the one I’m writing that I could link to. That would show you the depth of my indecision. What am I doing with my life? I know, I know. We all wonder that sometimes. But y’all, I have been having a quarter-life crisis for the last five years. And I’m only 25. This is a problem. A friend of Chelsea’s is coming to town this weekend. She’s graduating from college in May, and she wants to check out Nashville. She wants to learn about the music industry and see what it has to offer. She also wants “to be a part of something she believes in”. If this blog had existed four years ago, I would have been saying the exact same thing. Instead, I was talking about it to everyone I knew. I’m sure they were fascinated with my idealistic-fresh-out-of-college-ready-to-change-the-world self. I feel like I don’t have any direction. I like my job fine, but it’s certainly not making an impact. I’m not one of those people I hate (like Aaron and Susan) who have known since birth what they wanted to do. There are a lot of things I think I would like to do, but who knows? Why do I feel so much pressure to do something important? I read an article the other day about finding God’s will for you life. She talked about how we all worry about it in the important decisions – where to go to college, who to marry, where to live, what jobs to take. But really, God’s will is played out in the everyday of our lives… how we treat people, the things we say, how we choose to spend our time. He’s told us what is important, and it’s not where we work or what we study. It’s how we live. It seems so simple, yet somehow I always make it out to be so much bigger. Being concerned less with my occupation and more with the person I am relieves some of the pressure to DO SOMETHING. Because I am doing something, all day every day. Not to say that this will be the answer to my struggle… I’m sure I’ll be in the same place again in no time. I kind of live here. But maybe it will help me remember that I am not defined by my job, as much as I feel like I am.